Super Value Tuesday: The Mini-Fillet Challenge

80 mini-fillets. 8 hungry men. 1 fateful night. This, my friends, is the Super Value Tuesday Mini-Fillet Challenge. The premise is simple: each contestant orders a bucket of 10 delicious mini-fillets for £5.99, courtesy of the new Tuesday-only deal. Each contestant must then attempt to eat all 10 mini-fillets in a single sitting. Finish all 10, and become a legend.

Last Tuesday, members of KFB and friends headed down to the London flagship branch at Leicester Square to take on the aforementioned challenge. Each contestant had their own tactics, resulting in much cause for debate as we queued to order. Sides or no sides? Gravy or a dipping sauces? Wolf them down or take your time? For an extra £2 you can get 2 large sides with your chicken, an excellent deal which many of our party decided to plump for. Would this be their downfall? Read on to find out who won, who lost, and the unique perspectives of each contestant.

The Winners: Paddy, Obad, Albad and George

Obad

"In my hubris I believed that I could beat the Challenge easily, going so far as to order two additional hotwings in a cocksure salute to the colonels undying spirit. 30 minutes later, chewing through fillets that should have been delicious, but by now to me tasted like cement. I may have beaten the challenge, but at what cost? That grim xanatos: the toilet becons me, and I fear it's cold porcelain grip."

Albad

"Never before has the phrase 'the sweet taste of victory' been so apt. Having had a warmup session in which I split the 10 fillets with a compadre, I knew that adding sides into the mix would be a mistake. 

The chicken was fresh and extremely succulent, the atmosphere jubilant. As I popped the last morsel into my mouth I wondered whether this would be the highlight of my adult life: will it ever get better than this I pondered? And if it doesn't, I'll die a happy man."

George

"As nostalgic as mini-fillets are, the eating of 10 in a single sitting is not something I would recommend in a hurry. 12 hours on and my mouth is still dry despite the intake of several pints of water. With that being said, the strips were succulent, juicy and undeniably delicious. Next Tuesday?"

The Losers: Paulbot, Ben Dan, Dave

Paulbot

"First of all, I must give a hearty round of applause to the chicken technicians at the Leicester Sq branch for fulfilling a simultaneous order of 70 mini fillets without breaking a sweat. The chicken was hot, succulent and delicious; and for that, I thank you.

Unfortunately I can award no such accolade to myself. The first 4 fillets went down with astonishing ease and I felt confident about completing the challenge. Fillets 5, 6 and 7 required a more considered approach, devoured with lashings of gravy and ketchup (my preferred consumption lubricants). Fillet 8, one of the largest fillets in my bucket I should add, was a game changer - even the can of coke I had smuggled in couldn't help to overcome my salty stupor. The meat sweats kicked in, and I knew I was done for. I forced down fillet 9 in baby-sized bites, before throwing in the towel (freshen-up wipe) and conceding defeat. My biggest disappointment? Having to waste that last delicious fillet."

Dan

"It was, as some-novel-or-other put it, the best of times. It was the worst of times. Two incidents, almost twelve hours apart, yet inextricably linked and bridged by imagery as warm and brown as anything since the last Kasabian album.

Alas I am a miserable failure of a man; my dinnertime prowess rightfully mocked as pitiful by Oliver Manboat Horner, next to whom I had the misfortune to sit during our testosterone-fuelled duel with saltiness. Eight pieces of chicken, dipped and drizzled in high-quality gravy, alongside a minuscule percentage of my two trays of chips was all my light-framed body could handle, even washing it down with a litre-and-a-half of Diet Pepsi."

Dave

"I'd had my eye on the 10 Mini Fillets for £5.99 promotion for a few weeks and last night the opportunity to take the 10 Mini Fillet challenge arose. 59.9p per mini fillet is an excellent price although they probably get an extra £2 out of every customer who takes the two large sides for £2. Armed with my box of 10 a bottle of Pepsi and a large tub of gravy I took up position. Two down and I thought how easy polishing off ten was going to be. Four down and i was still going strong and enjoying the intense unadulterated hit of Original Recipe. By six, I was satisfied but felt I still had the wherewithal to complete the challenge. Seven down and I was getting fuller. Unfortunately 8 mini fillets coupled with an article on the BBC website about Bob Crow's fatal heart attack at 52 saw me bow out of the challenge defeated!"

London's trendy chicken offerings vs. The Colonel: an epic battle

First burritos, then burgers, now...fried chicken. Yes folks, fried chicken is indeed the latest craze in trend-loving London town. Over the past 6 months we've watched with interest as a number of fowl establishments have popped up in various guises across our capital. 

Here at KFB we felt it was important that we tried as many of these offerings as possible in order to answer for our readers the ultimate question: can anyone do fried chicken as well as the Colonel? Here's how we judged - each venue is scored against 2 simple criteria: taste and value. All orders were compared to the equivalent offering at KFC - chicken burgers vs. Fillet Tower burger, classic fried chicken vs. Original Recipe chicken pieces and so on. Here's how they stacked up.

Rita's, Dalston

While they serve a variety of different American style dishes we were only here for one thing: the much lauded fried chicken sandwich. Famous food critic Jay Rayner had this to say about it:

“Rita’s Bar and Dining in Dalston is a serious piece of work. This will probably be the best fried chicken you’ve ever had.”

Bold claims indeed, Mr Rayner and not entirely unfounded. The chicken was indeed very tasty and incredibly crunchy, even giving Extra Tasty Crispy treats from the Colonel a run for their money. Ultimately though at £6.50 a pop it just can't hope to stack up to it's larger, more cheese and hash brown laden brethren - the Fillet Tower.

Taste: 4/5
Value: 3/5

Does it beat the Colonel? No
Big thanks to WhatJoannaAte for the pic.

Spit & Roast, food stall

We encountered these folks at a street food market in Dalston (we don't hang out there every day, honest). They were serving a buttermilk fried chicken burger with Korean sauce. Given that we had a slider, the closest comparison would be a Mini Fillet. And while the sauce was very interesting (and quite spicy), the mini burger cost about £3 (nearly triple the cost of the Mini FIllet). Still, a tastily different take on fried chicken.

Taste: 3.5/5
Value: 2.5/5

Does it beat the Colonel? No


Roost, Soho pop up

Operating out of a Soho pub's kitchen for a couple of months, Roost offered a wide range of chicken-based dishes. Clearly though it was the fried chicken that we had to sample. We opted for an off-menu buttermilk fried chicken burger with chorizo and aioli. While delicious and the coating very crispy, the combination of the two accompanying strong flavours was perhaps a bit much. We would however like to see the Colonel experiment with chorizo as an alternative to the usual bacon.

Taste: 3.5/5
Value: 3/5

Does it beat the Colonel? No


Wishbone, Brixton

If you follow the UK fast food scene you'll have no doubt heard of MeatLiquor - the restaurant (and travelling van before it) that could well be credited with kick-starting London's renewed interest in pimped-up fast food. Imagine our excitement then when we heard that some of the people involved were opening a chicken only shop in South London's Brixton village market. Then imagine our disappointment when we arrived only to find extremely cramped 'tables' (shelves sticking out of the walls) and sub par fries that tasted as if they'd come straight out of a freezer via an ALDI. The chicken didn't fare much better - we sampled the Thai and Buffalo thigh nuggets, both of which came in very vinegary sauces that went soggy all too quickly. Colour us disappointed.

Taste: 2/5
Value: 3/5

Does it beat the Colonel? No

Mother Clucker Soho pop up

In similar vein to Roost, these chaps are currently appearing at a Soho pub (the Endurance on Berwick St). The menu is a fairly sparse affair - we opted for the combo that included a buttermilk biscuit, some 'Cluster Clucks' which were similar to popcorn chicken, a drumstick and some waffle fries. As intriguing as they sound, waffle fries essentially equate to crisps and weren't particularly interesting. Better was the chicken - the popcorn style bites were the real winners - tasty and crunchy in equal measure. At £7.50 it did offer good value - though with a box meal at the Colonel offering a similar quantity of food at £2 or so less, they were never going to win out on the money front. Oh and the biggest disappointment - the lack of gravy. As all chicken fans know, a tub of lubricant to help the fowl slide down is essential.

Taste: 3.5/5
Value: 3.5/5

Does it beat the Colonel? No


Lucky Fried Chicken, Kentish Town pop up

Pop up. Pub. You may have spotted a bit of a theme here. The chaps who have in this blogger's opinion crafted London's best burger (check out http://www.luckychipuk.com/) were doing a residency above a pub in North London that has now sadly come to an end. First to draw our attention was the familiar effigy and tagline in use. Sacrilegious on the one hand, inspired on the other - we'll let you decide.

Between 4 of us we opted for 2 Jumbo boxes and a couple of fries and coleslaws for good measure. As it turns out this was a bountiful bevy of food. And oh what food it was. First off we sampled the coating. Though not hugely crunchy it was bursting with flavour. We're not sure what herbs and spices they were using (and certainly not the same as in Original Recipe) but damn, that was some serious taste. Then onto the chicken itself - we can safely say we've never before sampled chicken as juicy as this. In fact, we'd struggle to think of any kind of meat we've ever sampled anywhere that was this juicy. Much like the Colonel, though the sides were tasty, the chicken was absolutely the star of the show. And between the four of us, the meal came in well under £10 each, not including beer.

Is it wrong to say that we've found chicken better than that at KFC? Quite possibly. Is it true? 3 of our team sampled the chicken and in our expert opinions, we'd have to say yes. Now remember that this was a tiny pop up above a pub, not a huge international chain. And that it did indeed cost more than the equivalent at KFC. But we've got to hand it to them, the folks at LFC certainly know what they're doing. Colonel - we hope you're watching.

Taste: 5/5
Value: 4.5/5

Does it beat the Colonel? Yes, yes it does.

The KFC Halal Trial: mouths-on report

Earlier this year we caught wind of a halal trial occurring at several KFC branches across London. Now as all our loyal readers are no doubt aware, the only religion for us here at KFB HQ is the Church of Harland. However, we're not the type to shy away from new experiences, especially when they're chicken related. And so it was that we made the long and arduous trip down the road to our closest KFC, the Bethnal Green branch.

Picture the scene if you will: Pbad and myself are suffering the effects of a heavy night on the hooch and have decided the curing properties of the Colonel's chicken are the only logical option for brunch. We promenade our way down Bethnal Green high street until the Harland's smiling face peaks over the top of the chain of newsagent and pound shop signs. A smile crosses both our faces as we give each other a knowing look. Drawing closer to the branch we notice the above poster proudly displayed in the window. I turn towards Pbad as I exclaim

"Let's get halal!"

Before we get into the product itself though there are a few considerations to take into account. First and perhaps most importantly, in order for the food to be declared halal, KFC have had to pass numerous inspections by the Halal Food Authority. This means the way the chicken is slaughtered and prepared is of great importance. Though we'd previously chosen to believe that Harland himself whispered a prayer into the ear of every chicken just before it was to make the ultimate sacrifice, it has come to light that at the time of slaughter a blessing is recited by an 'appropriate person' as part of halal accreditation. As wel all know, Harland himself was deeply Christian, therefore lessenning his appropriateness for this task somewhat. To read more about the details of the trial, click here.

"Enough with the details!" I hear you decry. "How does it taste?" Well let us tell you now, it tastes...exactly the same. There is however one crucial element missing. An element so crucial in fact that its absence has caused an ENTIRE BURGER to be removed from the menu. And the name of this absent item?

Bacon.

Yes, bacon. Sadly, the laws of halal explicitly state that all pork products are banned. And sadly for us KFC lovers, this neccessitates the exclusion of the Big Daddy Burger - sure favourite of the manliest of men (have you ever tried to eat an entire Big Daddy box meal and lived to tell the tale?). In some regards removing a non-chicken based meat could be seen as a good thing. A purification of sorts. And yet in another way, bacon is plain delicious. So onto the bottom line: While halal opens up KFC to a vast and untapped new audience, it also casts aside a delicious burger. A mixed bag then ladies and gentlemen, a mixed bag indeed.

KFParadox

It is again with great sadness that I report to you the closure of one of KFB's favourite branche's: London's Farringdon Branch at 48 Cowcross Street, London.

Sadly Farringdon which served us well especially ALBAD was not shut by some diktat from up on high within the company, but was cut down in the prime of its life, by beuracrats who have, at least, unwittingly authored their own demise.

I remember fondly a lunch meeting I shared there with ALBAD, it was a mere stones throw from the Farringdon tube stop and was serving excellent Blazin' Boxmasters. I have no doubt that in time the KFC's of central London would have become synonymous with the cafe's of Paris' left bank, places where KFB's members philosiphised upon and shaped chicken thinking for decades to come. whether this shift in dynamic can be harmlessly absorbed remains to be seen.

The worst part about this tragedy is that the very reason for its closure undermines and makes unfeasible the project that has precipitated its untimely demise. . . . . in short a paradox is being created.


The official line on the closure is this:

"With reference to the Farringdon store, I asked the question and we have had to close our Farringdon restaurant after a compulsory purchase order under The Crossrail Act."

London's crossrail project, a farce over 20 years in the making. Billions of pounds of taxpayers money is being spent on an infrastructure project that, yet again serves only the South East, rushed through as a political expedient to shore up our ailing governments profile amongst voters.

This money could have been better spent providing new, and improving existing local transport links to KFC across the country. Better still long awaited plans to introduce KFC and Colonel Sanders to the national schools curriculum in replacement of one of those fad subjects maths, science or English could have been realised. Instead, A branch is being destroyed. So where does the paradox come in?

Well, when conducting market research and feasibility studies for this dispicable project the people of Essex and Surrey were asked if they wanted improved transport links into central and across London. The answer was invariably yes. But what the people were not asked was why they were clamouring to get to London. It was just assumed for work, but the real reason is Chicken. Everyone wants to visit a busy city centre branch with high food turnover and so hot and delicious meals every time. Farringdon sits at the very heart of the project and is the epicentre of London chicken culture. And so, what the planners have failed to realise is this:

If you take away the chicken, you will take away peoples need and desire to travel into London, thus invalidating the entire project, dooming it before it's even begun, and leaving a cancerous artery snaking its way through this once great city!

However hope may be on the horizon, for head office has sent us word,

"We are looking at sites in the local vicinity and I will keep you posted if I hear of anything further."

But just as the Jews are more interested in visiting the site of their first temple in Jerusalem destroyed by the Romans, rather than embracing new religious sites, echoes of that self same situation can be seen over 2000 years later here in London.

Colonel 'defaced'. Quite literally.

Imagine our disgust upon gleely perusing the newly launched Google Maps Street View* UK only to find evidence of defamation of our glorious leader, Harland (may he rest in peace).

I present to you Evidence A from the East Ham branch:

And Evidence B from our local Bethnal Green outlet:

Avid readers may remember a report on a similar act of vandalism last year. It would seem Google (whose motto is somewhat ironically 'Do nothing evil') have still not worked out a way to improve their automatic facial recognition and blurring software in order to ignore bright white and blue faces. Shame on them.


*For those readers that aren't familiar, Street View allows you to view Google Maps from street level. Click on the photos above to launch the examples.

KFC London: Oxford Street (The Plaza)

A popular restaurant in one of London's busiest shopping areas, the Oxford Street KFC located in The Plaza's food court is frequented daily by 1000s* of shoppers, city workers and tourists. Many a hung-over Saturday shopping trip has begun in ernest at this branch, so it's about time we conducted a full review - myself and fellow KFBlogger Albad head down to check it out. (*estimated amount)

Paulbot
My Order: Fillet Tower meal, large
My Opinions: Service was very swift, which was pleasing to see and is typically the case at these high profile locations. My burger was well constructed and warm to the touch, while both mayo and ketchup had been added in the appropriate quantities. The chicken seemed to be slightly dry but still perfectly edible and forgiveable considering the generous amount of chips I was given. Overall, a pleasing experience on this occassion, but on previous visits I have found the quality to be quite variable - this may come down to the staff that are on duty and time of day.
Score: 7/10

Albad
My Order: Zinger Tower meal, large
My Opinions: Like Paulbot I have had a variable past with this particular branch. I remember one fateful afternoon trip during which I was served a Zinger Tower with chicken so overcooked and hard it would be better described as some kind of meat–flavoured biscuit rather than the succulent chicken fillet piece we are used to. However, on this occasion all was well in the world of Oxford St KFC. The chicken juicy, the salsa spicy and the bun fluffy. Incredibly, the chicken technician on duty out back in the kitchen even avoided the all too common over-enthusiastic mayo application. The main problem with the meal was merely the size: being in an incredibly hungover state as I was, it was necessary to replenish my body with vast quantities of liquid. As such, a large Pepsi Max was the only option. Sadly, the accompanying large fries got the better of me once again.
Score: 7/10