Monday 13 December 2010

The KFB Festive Tower Burger

For many years we at KFB have had a dream. A dream so beautiful and so potentially delicious that we've been afraid to put plans into motion to make that dream a reality. Well my chicken-loving readers, the time has come.

We for many years have felt that KFC are missing a huge trick by not offering a festive-themed burger over the Christmas season. In fact, we went as far as to share the idea for the burger you are about to witness with the head of product development during our famous HQ visit a couple of years ago (has it really been that long already?). Sadly, and some might say foolishly, they just weren't willing to listen. KFB believes the only man who would have been willing to take note of such a radical and genius idea would have been our Lord Sanders himself.

The idea is simple: take all the core elements that make a traditional Christmas dinner so fantastic, remove the bland items such as dry turkey or soggy sprouts and combine with all that makes KFC so wondrous. Our ingredients list was as follows:

  • Chicken fillet pieces
  • Stuffing
  • Roast potato
  • Gravy
  • Cranberry sauce
  • Spinach
  • Buns

And now the construction could begin in earnest. Our first job was to prep the potatoes which were to function as a hash brown replacement. These were cut into 8mm thick slices, covered in oil and seasoned before being roasted in a hot oven. To accompany them in their fiery furnace was stuffing and of course, the chicken. Top tip: be sure to use chicken fillet pieces rather than the far inferior reconstituted pieces that are so prevalent in our supermarkets and often coated in a deceptively tempting sounding 'southern fried coating'.

Next up came the all important assembly - an exercise that has turned so many otherwise delicious Zinger Towers into a sticky, uneven mess. We started by spreading cranberry sauce on the top bun half and carefully laying spinach leaves on the bottom. This was followed by the chicken, roast potato slice, stuffing patty and a generous helping of gravy. Disclaimer: We did in fact use the Colonel's own wonder-liquid in our burger, if only because we have never tasted a home-made gravy that could match the consistency or taste.


All that was left to do now was to place the top bun upon our mound of lip-smackingly succulent sustenance. Et voila!


And so onto the tasting. The most immediate problem we faced who how on earth to eat the thing - our mouths sadly only being the size of an average human's rather than some kind of huge monster's. Once we'd overcome this issue with some gentle squashing, we took our first bite. A rush of festive flavours immediately brought to mind Christmas trees, snowy scenes and glowing stars in the night sky (though this was perhaps something to do with the Christmas music in the background). It was highly enjoyable, the stuffing providing a nice texture contrast with the crispy potato and the saltiness of the chicken being balanced by the sharp, sweet cranberry. 


Not everything was A1 though - the chicken was of course nowhere near the standards we've come to expect from the Colonel and though certainly yummy, the stuffing was slightly bland and sloppy. Had we had more time, creating our own chicken coating and sausagemeat-based stuffing would have alleviated such concerns.

The verdict: 7/10
But could have very easily nudged its way up to a supreme 9 with home-made chicken coating, sausagemeat stuffing and perhaps even a little bacon.

For other home-recreations be sure to view our Toasted Twister, Double Down and Zinger Tower recreations.