Tuesday, 6 January 2009

A letter to KFC HQ

Mr David Goodman
xx xxx xxxxxx
xxxx xxx

Dear Sir or Madam,

We here at Kentucky Fried Bloggin’ were very excited when you launched the trial of KFC AM in London last May. Those at KFB’s head office have had the pleasure of a number of the breakfast items. However, those of us diligently working at the regional office in Staffordshire have not been so lucky. It has sadly been some time since I travelled to our nation’s capital and I’ve been unable to sample the AM menu.

I understand that the trial was to further extended to the Tyne Tees area (incidentally a region I have never travelled to for either business or pleasure), I do hope the two trials have been a success and a national roll out is to be unveiled soon? If so I would love to know when this will be exactly?

Reviews of the AM products, especially the ingredient packed AM Wrapstar have been very favourable although the bent towards possibly excessive levels of cheese has been commented upon. Only 1 item on the new AM menu is devoid of cheese and with roughly 5% of Northern Europeans being lactose intolerant, is this wise?

Whilst I’m here I’d also like to take the time to make a few additional comments on the UK operation in general. Firstly it’s great! I’ve recently completed a US tour of KFC’s encompassing Louisville, Kentucky where unfortunately the tail end of last summer’s hurricane Ike prevented us from visiting the Colonel’s grave. Another real treat was in Utah where we visited the world’s fist KFC. . . . . . a dream come true. I have some pictures if you would like to see them? American menus were so varied from branch to branch, but ultimately there was no Zing which for me is the cornerstone of my personal enjoyment of KFC. However of all the KFC’s in all the world the UK’s are the best with by far and away the best menu.

Another great thing you did in 2008 was to entirely overhaul that tired old website for the brilliant paradigm I see before me, it really is the acme of QSR websites. I particularly love the part where, when the graphics are loading, the viewer is told that the website is not ‘loading’ but that it is ‘adding secret ingredients’, genius.

Your constant commitment to product innovation should be applauded, the Flavour Station, Hot Rods (a particular favourite) the Big Daddy Burger and the Wrapstar have all tickled our taste buds in 2008 and we look forward to further innovations in 2009. However, without a doubt, the Zinger Tower burger remains the apogee of your menu.

One small gripe I have though is the ‘Contact us’ section of your website. I found no email address by which to ‘contact you’, it would be great if I didn’t have to damage the planet (and my pocket, though that’s of lesser concern to me) by sending this letter. Any plans to introduce an email contact address?

Our members also wonder if there is a way we can get a complete list of operating KFC branches in the UK in order for us to visit them all and plot our progress on a map at KFBHQ using a system of coloured pins.

We have also composed a prayer, based on the traditional Christian Lord’s prayer. It was amazing actually how easily a false idol such as Colonel Sanders slipped so easily into the role of deity. I wonder, would you like to see it?

I look forward to your reply, and hearing any comments you may have. I do hope you’re able to clear up a couple of the points for me.

Many Thanks
David Goodman

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